My Butterfly

Recently Nathan has become uncharacteristically clingy in public--hiding behind me when adults talk to him, gluing himself to my leg, and refusing to communicate in anything but a strange animal noise language (wha???). He once loved to go to visit the ladies that work with Ryan because they dote on him and give him treats and make him feel like a million bucks, but these days he just hides his face whenever we walk into their office. 

If Isaac had pulled this kind of stunt as a young kid, it would have totally freaked me out. I would have been reading books about what might be wrong with him, losing sleep over his timidness, and trying everything I could to change his behavior.

Experience, though, is a great teacher, and if I've learned one lesson over and over as a parent, it's that  I can't control my children (or anyone else for that matter). And I don't need to (hallelujah!). If Nathan wants to be uncharacteristically shy, he totally can. And I can love him anyway. When he's ready, he will spread his little chatterbox wings and take off, just like this butterfly (that, as you can see, he was too shy to set free yesterday). 

A Few Favorite Read-Alouds

Over the past few months the kids and I have read several really great books together, and I always love to share a good find. My kids get enough goofy, fluffy reading in (hello Calvin and Hobbes!), so I try to choose books with a moral or social message when I read to them. Each of the following books allows for great discussion on how to treat other children who might be a little bit different than you.

Ally Nickerson has never felt smart, until she meets a teacher who cares enough to see her true intelligence. 

Melody is a 12-year-old girl who was born with severe cerebral palsy. She has a million thoughts going on in her head but has never spoken a word out loud. Read what life might be like to have so many ideas and thoughts and not be able to express them. 

You've likely heard of Wonder and Auggie Pullman, but in case you've been living under a rock for the past few years, let me just put in a plug for this book. It will tear at your heart strings. Auggie was born with mandifulofacial dystostis, a rare facial deformity. Wonder takes place as Auggie is beginning his fifth grade year at a private school after being home-schooled his entire life. It is told from several different perspectives and will have you falling in love with Auggie and his entire family. Wonder is being made into a movie that will be released this fall. Here's a trailer. Everyone ages 8-108 should read this book. 

Keeping Commitments

Many people are dependable and reliable when it comes to keeping commitments to others, but struggle to keep commitments they make to themselves (I'll exercise...tomorrow...eat healthy...one day...get up early...next week...). I have been known to fall into that category. In an attempt to exercise my writing skills and hopefully improve them, I made a commitment to no one but myself that I would write a blog post each day for 30 days. Because I said I would. Here's to writing and improving each day. Wish me luck. And more than anything, hopefully I'm learning keep my commitments to myself.

The Load

I recently read a book by Ryan Holiday titled The Obstacle is the Way and his ideas have been floating around in my brain ever since. The premise of this particular self-help book is that obstacles or trials in our lives will become the very things that strengthen us if we let them. Not in spite of them but because of them. Holiday gives many many examples from history to prove his point, with inspirational figures from Abraham Lincoln to Amelia Earhart to Marcus Aurelius.

"The obstacle in the path becomes the path. Never forget, with every obstacle is an opportunity to improve our condition."

I have thought a lot about the current obstacles I am facing and how, instead of trying to convince myself that what I'm going through "isn't that bad" (which is better than wallowing in self-pity--I'm a pro at that), I can focus on how my particular trials are shaping me into the kind of person I want to be. Better than before, as Gretchen Rubin would say.

"Your biggest problem is that you think you shouldn't have them."--Tony Robbins

In April of 2014 Elder David A. Bednar gave a talk in General Conference called "Bear Up Their Burdens with Ease". You might remember him telling the story of a friend who got stuck in the mountains in his new 4-wheel-drive truck after attempting to bring home fire wood for the winter. It wasn't until he loaded the back of  his pick-up truck with wood that his tires had enough traction to get unstuck from the snow. It was the load of wood that ended up helping to set him free.

"Each of us also carries a load. Our individual load is comprised of demands and opportunities, obligations and privileges, afflictions and blessings, and options and constraints...Sometimes we mistakenly may believe that happiness is the absence of a load. But bearing a load is a necessary and essential part of the plan of happiness."

Why is the load necessary? Why can't life just be easy? Wouldn't we be happier without problems? And doesn't God want us to be happy? Of course He does, so He provided a way through His Son.

  "The unique burdens in each of our lives help us to rely on the merits, mercy, and grace of the Holy Messiah." -Elder Bednar

The load will humble us and help us turn to Him ,and eventually return to Him.

The Cyclist

One of Nathan's favorite things to do is ride his bike. He goes around and around and around the driveway. We first tested Balance Bikes with Davis. It was pretty amazing to watch him first scoot around on our neighbor's little bike with no pedals and then, once he got the balancing down, transition right into a regular 2-wheeler. No training wheels needed. Nathan had a similar experience. He practiced on his balance bike until he could zoom around without falling and then we bought him a little two-wheeler. I love seeing their confidence grow as they learn new skills. I'm pretty sure Nathan thinks he's the fastest cyclist in the world when he rides around on his little white bike.